Thinking.

I have been thinking and thinking, since Wednesday night, after my conversation with Mea.

Quite possibly over-thinking, which is something that I am prone to do.  Especially, when there is nothing that I can do about whatever it is that I am thinking about.  Rolling over in my mind what others are thinking, what I would do if I were in the other position, and just over-thinking about all the things.

I picked Mea up from school yesterday afternoon by myself.  I needed to set up our Parent/Teacher conference time with Mrs. M anyway, so I went in a couple of minutes before the bell rang to visit with her.  The kids were getting their coats on, and lining up at the door when I came in. 

Mrs. M pulled me aside, and said that she talked to the principal, and the principal had decided that because Mea told me about what had been said to her, and didn’t tell Mrs. M when it happened, Mrs. M couldn’t say anything to the little girl, or say anything to her family about the incident that had happened.  Mea was very explicitly told that if anyone says anything to her ever again, she is to immediately go tell Mrs. M.

Whenever I have a situation where I am just unsure of how to completely react, I do try very hard to put myself in all of the various pairs of shoes, and look at things from everyone’s individual perspective.  I need to do this, so I can process my own reaction.  I actually thought to myself, if Mack had been the little white girl in this story, what would my reaction have been?  Let me tell you, I didn’t need to think long about what it would have been, not long at all.

I would have wanted to know what my child had said.  Specifically, so that I could make sure, without a doubt, that she knew that what she had said to Mea was hurtful.  Specifically, so that I could make sure that she understood why it was hurtful.  Specifically, so that it would never happen again. 

Unless kids are taught that it’s wrong to say such things to other kids, how will they ever know better?  I know that I am teaching my children not to be hateful, I know that most likely all of my regular readers and friends are teaching their children this as well, but what about that kid that goes to school, comes home, and their parents don’t teach them anything beyond what is taught in the classroom?  Where are those children going to learn that it’s not okay to say mean, hurtful things?

I haven’t talked about this in front of Mea since Wednesday night when she told me about this, and her Dad and I talked about it with her.  She hasn’t said anything about it, and I know for a fact that she and this little girl played together yesterday.  She seems fine.  Unscathed. 

I just hope that we helped to prepare her in the event that there is a next time. 

I hope that we did.  I really do. 

What I wish for more?

That there is no next time.