>Shucks….Am I Really Missing Vacation?

>My Mom and Dad, sister and her family are all headed down to Florida for vacation on Saturday.  My brother-in-law has a conference for work, and they planned the trip around his conference.  They asked us to go with them in January, and I declined.  I’m glad now that I did, with this work situation with my husband, although I was pretty torn on what I wanted to do at the time.

I love my sister and brother-in-law and nieces.  I love my parents. 

I can’t vacation with all of them.

They kind of  have a tendency to make me mental, and a week stuck in Florida may have gotten ugly, mouse ears and all.

My Mom gets pouty.  My sister gets pissy.  I just get irritated by them both when this happens.  Somehow, I always end up being the adult in charge of Mea and my niece, and since they are insane together, it makes me want to kill the other adults that allow this to happen.

So this decision may have been for the best.

So I’m also going to share a TMI about going on vacation somewhere warm with my mom.  I warned you, don’t say I didn’t.  If you don’t want to know, stop reading NOW

My sister and I went on a cruise with my Mom and our Aunt, about six months before our Aunt died.  It was our our “Girls Only” trip.  My cousins wife came as well.  So just the five of us, fancy suite.  It was fun.

My Mom has been on multiple cruises, I repeat, multiple.  With us, with my Dad, with their friends.  Several times now.

Someone needs to break down and tell her.

She needs to hide, or maintain, the big grey bush.

It’s downright embarrassing.

We come from some hairy ancestors.  My sister and I have discussed it.  We don’t really know what we are, a mishmash of everything at this point really, but somewhere along the line, we are part Sasquatch.  Really.

We’ve tried just being a little gentle.  Let’s go swimsuit shopping, get a skirty one, or shorty ones this time….Let’s go get waxed….Let’s buy you a pair of hedge clippers?

None of it has worked.  Besides that her swimming suit is thread bare in the back, and she really does need a new one, I don’t think she would actually buy a skirt one or a shorts one.  She thinks that they are “matronly.”  This is where I roll my eyes, slide off, and snicker to myself….

Neither of us have decided how we can just say, “Ewww, you are gross.  Take care of that shit.”

There’s just no polite way of telling your Mom that she needs to go get her bush waxed.

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5 Comments on “>Shucks….Am I Really Missing Vacation?”

  1. Jen says:

    >Hah! I just laughed so hard I had had tears rolling down my face.

  2. Kimberly says:

    >Oh.Mah. In the name of all things beaver…this is hilarious.

  3. KimN says:

    >Oh my….this is so hilarious I had to read it to Ben and now we are both cracking up.

  4. Heather says:

    >Oh man… what a topic!! Yeah, you have tried all the solutions I would suggest. Perhaps the straight out approach may be needed.


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