Is Santa Still Coming?

I have a dilemma.

Having a six-year-old and a twenty-year-old brings challenges at times.  I am perplexed as to how to handle Santa this year.  It has not been an issue until now, although, I suppose if I would have thought about it last year it could have been but, I just didn’t think about it.

Mack has not been living at home for a little over two years.  The first year she was at Yellow State, she was home for break, and this didn’t even come up.  Last year, she came home a few days before Christmas but mostly stayed at her boyfriend’s house, with the exception of Christmas Eve where she did stay at home with us.

She hasn’t stayed overnight at home since then.

If she is in town for more than a day, she stays the night at her boyfriend’s house.  He still lives at home, but apparently his mother doesn’t mind.  With Mea at home, Mack knows not to even ask if BF can sleep over at our house.  It is not happening.

Most likely, when she is done with school next semester, she will move back to our city, and she and the BF will get an apartment together.  This is the current plan anyway.  They have been together for two years.  I am not surprised.  She will be twenty-one by the time they move, and I am surprisingly okay with everything.  I will be more than happy that she is back in town, and not forty-five minutes away any longer.  We like the boyfriend.  He is nice.  He has finally decided that I don’t hate him, so he is loosening up around us.

Santa has brought presents for Mack, the same way that I, um, he always has, since her very first Christmas.  I know some may think this is a bit weird, but the way things worked, it just never stopped.  She was fourteen when we had D staying with us.  He was seven.  We did Santa for them both.  The next year, Mea was home.  She was eighteen months.  We did Santa for them both.  Then next year, and the next year, and the next and so on.

So this is where I just don’t know what to do.  If Mack does come home and stay the night with us on Christmas Eve, do I do Santa again for her?  If she stays the night with her boyfriend, and isn’t home Christmas morning, do I do Santa for her?

Now, this has nothing to do with Mack, and her feelings about Santa.  I am just trying to figure out how to best handle this for Mea.  I don’t want her confused.  I don’t really want any big elaborate story to tell her. 

The thing is that this year and next may be the last years that she truly believes.  I don’t want that to get screwed up.  I want her to be a little girl as long as humanly possible. 

I have talked to Mack about the situation, and I told her that I need an answer about whether or not she’ll be staying the night with us on Christmas Eve one way, or the other, within the next couple of weeks.  I am thinking that if I know that she will be home, or know she won’t be home, I can set a stage for what I do with Mea before we get to the actual night.

But I need to decide what I should do, what I should say before all of that.  Part of me keeps thinking, I could say that once you turn twenty, Santa just does your stocking.  (We still all get stockings at my Mom and Dad’s house.  It is actually one of my favorite parts of Christmas, the stocking things.)  But, the other part of me wonders if that even makes sense to say. 

My sister suggested, that Santa comes until you have kids, but that could mean that Santa comes for Mack for quite a while longer.  (I hope for this at least.  Please, please wait for a while my dear, sweet Mack before having some babies.) So I don’t really think that one will work.

So, what do you think?  Am I making too big of a deal about all of it?  Am I over thinking? 

Any and all suggestions are welcome.


4 Comments on “Is Santa Still Coming?”

  1. Jen says:

    I really like the stocking after 20 idea because it sets up well and doesn’t seem too contrived for a six year old to believe in.

  2. shannon2818 says:

    My mom did Santa for me and my sister well into our teens. We just thought it was so funny.

  3. libbylogic says:

    You’re overthinking, but you’re a mom, so it’s permitted. I think you should ask Mack to be home on Christmas Eve. It isn’t that much to ask. And I think you should get her Santa gifts. Maybe have a note too that says “I’ve loved bringing you gifts, now enjoy being a grown up, Love Santa.”

    And I am LOVING the Santa thing this year. So easy to get kids to do things…

    • Kelly says:

      I love the letter idea, Libby! I have talked to Mack and she is staying with us on Christmas Eve. Very bittersweet, as I am sure it will be the last one.

I like thoughtful comments!

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