My New Normal

I am into week three of unemployment.  I have come to a few realizations in the last few days.

Yesterday, I could feel a bit of depression sneaking up on me.  I cannot let that happen.  Recognizing it is the first step.  Last night, when I went to make dinner for Mea I realized that I hadn’t eaten anything since the day before at lunch time.  Also, not good.  I honestly hadn’t even realized it.

I had a phone interview yesterday for a job that I don’t really believe that I want at all.  The interview must have gone fairly well, because I was asked to come to an in-person interview on Thursday.  I am going to go, if anything for the experience of interviewing again.  It’s been 10 years since I have been the interviewee, I need the practice.  I didn’t actually apply for a job with this company, the District Manager saw my resume on an employment site, and emailed me.

After I got off the phone with him, I decided a couple of things.  First, I need to start getting up in the morning, getting showered and dressed before I take Mea to school.  Taking that phone interview with bed head, and in my pajamas was not good for my overall attitude.  I had gotten into a bad habit of not getting ready until just before I went to pick Mea up for school.  Which means lots of time in my pj’s with bed head.  No more.

My brother-in-law revamped my resume.  I am amazed at how great it is.  I still wonder in some ways if I should have someone else take a look at it, so if I have any volunteers out here, please let me know and I will email it to you.

I also went over our finances.  I can actually afford to be off work for about eight months, if I have to be.  Maybe longer.  This actually made me feel loads better.  I am still worried about how things are going to work, but I don’t feel like I have to settle for a job that is less than what I am qualified for just for the money.  I also figured out that I can probably take a cut in pay if I have to.  Just knowing how much I can afford, makes me feel better.

I had thought for a while about returning to retail.  I have taken it off of the table, at least for now.  It is an absolute last resort.  A few reasons.  I am ten years older than I was when I last did it.  It was hard on my body ten years ago.  I have had three surgeries in the last ten years, mostly due to those retail years, it was insanely hard on my feet, knees and ankles, and I am ten years older.  I have finally gotten to the point where my feet no longer hurt all the time, I can’t be in physical pain all the time.  It is just not worth it.  Also, my husband is working retail.  Baseball season is upon us.  The logistics of figuring out schedules for both of us, and Mea, with both of us working weekends and nights makes me want to cry.  I don’t think she would do well with it.  I don’t think I would do well with it.

I needed to remind myself of the sacrifice I made when I started my last career.  When I left retail management, and went to work doing what I was most recently doing, I took almost a 50% cut in pay to get my foot in the door.  It took nearly ten years, and a lot of hard work to get myself back into the financial position that I was in before.  It is ridiculous to do that again in any way shape or form.  I am too old, and I have too much experience to throw it away.

Now a few things that haven’t been all bad.  My house is spotless, laundry is done and put away, dishes are done, we are eating better than we have in a long time.  I have lost about ten pounds.  The only thing that I can attribute this to specifically, is the fact that I am not getting a large latte every single day.  Saying goodbye to the caramel latte wasn’t as hard as I thought it would be, in addition to the fact that I am saving $5 per day, what a waste.  It will be a treat from this point on.

I have been able to spend more time with my Mom.  I have been able to spend more time with Mea.  I will be spending more time with my sister now that she is done with all of her travels.  I have been able to talk to Mack more frequently.  These things are all pluses.

I am looking for the bright spots in all of this.  Some days it’s harder to find them than others, but I am trying.

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3 Comments on “My New Normal”

  1. Jen says:

    I am glad you took the time to review your finances so you know your situation well. That’s a really huge deal, good for you! I also think you should go on Thursday because it will be good to get an interview under your belt where you aren’t feeling pressured by the “want” of the outcome. Smart cookie you are!

  2. KimN says:

    Transitioning from working to being home is hard, hard. That is the truth. I definitely find that getting up and ready (showering etc) before taking the kids to school is a huge improvement to my overall well being. I’m not saying I put on make up or dry/straighten my hair everyday (or most days… ehem) but I am clean, dressed, and with brushed teeth. As a side note, the other day I saw a mom come into the school wearing thermal see through elmo PJ pants and slippers. I mean come on, how hard is it to throw on some jeans and real shoes especially if you know you are getting out of the car and walking into the building to greet your child’s teacher. Anyways, I applaud you that your house is clean. It seems since I started staying home, mine is messier then ever. I hope the perfect job comes along soon…one you can be excited about.

  3. 4evrmama says:

    I treated my pending lay-off as a project. I created a shreadsheet and listed everything I could think of to make money (i.e. sell hair, sell crap on CL, finish some of the craft items and sell those) and items to save money (like not buying your $5 latte). I then listed each based on effort, financial win/savings, and desirability. Giving up cable was more desirable than stipping, for example. Going vegetarian 3 days out of the week was easier than selling plasma. I felt I had some kind of control if I made a list. Some of the things we did (like ending cable and giving up smart phones) are things we still do to this day. Others we stopped doing (if it’s yellow, let it mellow…)

    I applaud you getting back to a routine. If nothing else, it shows Mea how to handle some downfalls in life.


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